True Life: to live and to love

So a few years ago I decided on the sort of lifestyle that I want to live. I want to be a person of integrity. Someone who is just honest and free. Someone who is devoted. Devoted to my love of God. Devoted to serving others, growing my brain and living out my life’s purpose. I find that when I am able to fulfill my life’s passions, my spirit is fully free and at ease. I’m just here to love and spread as much love as I can. My creativity gives me agency to achieve that. The gift of creativity is so powerful. And I realized that the reason I’m here is deeper than I know. But I choose to be obedient to the spirit. As a deeply spiritual person who is always striving to experience connection, I realized I can’t just do the same things that most people that I know do. Especially pertaining to social experiences and who i spend my time with. I’m just trying as much as possible to be only surrounded by people who I can be myself entirely. Free to be who i am without apology and without having to ask permission. Free to make mistakes and still receive grace. To feel seen, heard, respected and valued mutually. I’m a sensitive person. Something I’ve been scarlet lettered as since I was a young child. Always “too sensitive” but I feel so empowered to be a highly sensitive person. What a superhero type strength. I’m so in-tune with my senses that I am really able to have such a beautiful experience in life. The ability to be observant, to stay curious, to notice and wonder.

Knowing the sort of life I desire, I am always striving to build such a practice that it becomes second nature to live like this. I love feeling connected to nature and to experience a real love and soul connection to other people. So I do something every single day that keeps me mindful, present and grounded into sustaining that reality. I really struggled with anxiety for most of my childhood into adolescence. A crippling anxiety. I got a head full of traumas but with God there is always healing and restoration. And although my healing journey started with a lot of antidepressants and antipsychotics, I was always eager to find natural ways of healing. Through my daily practices of nutrients, prayer, reading, meditating and writing, I’ve been able to become a master of myself. I have a ton of self care activities that i swap out as needed. This has helped me so much. I know how to take inventory of my needs, capacities and deficiencies but also because it’s like I know and love me from the inside out now, enforcing boundaries are a lot more seamless. That’s been the game changer. I just want a life of comfort. Every single day I’m just practicing to be able to have the most comfortable and joyful experience. Certain things in life are just sacred. So really honoring my temple has changed my idea about why I’m here and how I’d like to spend my time.

I think that living is an artistic experience. And we are all creators. Being in nature is so inspiring and being able to apply wisdoms we find every day just by being in nature radically changes lives. Even through all of life’s inevitable challenges, life is always beautiful. And I try as much as possible to stay grateful for all of the beautiful things that bring me peace, love and joy. This is the only way I know how to increase my awareness, vibrations and frequency.☎️

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